Matthew 7:12
“Here is a simple, rule-of-thumb guide for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them. Add up God’s Law and Prophets and this is what you get.
Scripture quotations from The Message. © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress, Colorado Springs, CO. All rights reserved.
In her book The Glass Castle, author Jeanette Walls provides us with a vivid picture of her childhood. Walls’ mother and father were somewhat the “poster children” for dysfunctional parenting. If you read this book, you will wonder how Walls and her siblings ever wanted to have anything to do with their parents. And yet, they cared for their father as he lay dying when the rigors of alcoholism ravaged his body – and ultimately took his life. Walls opens her book with a description of pulling up alongside her mother, who was dumpster diving on the streets of New York City, and inviting her into the car for a conversation.
Many people would have looked the other way and pretended that this was not their mother…or they would have rushed her into the car and ridiculed her for embarrassing them in such a manner. But Walls did neither. She does not speak of a faith in Christ in her books, but surely she has developed an understanding of the basic tenet of what we know as “The Golden Rule” somewhere…somehow. She is able to put aside her own humiliation…what would be understandable resentment for the way she, her brother and sister were reared – neglected and mistreated, if not downright abused. Jeanette Walls is able to consider the person before her and ask a simple question, “How would I want to be treated?” And this is how she responds.
Surely you have had at least one instance in your life where someone has essentially – if not literally – slapped you in the face. You’ve been the brunt of an embarrassing or derogatory gesture…you’ve been called an ugly name, experienced a betrayal, or someone has treated you so unkindly that you felt like the breath was sucked from your lungs. Maybe you have been lonely, sick or injured…and no one bothered to even call to check on you – much less visit and offer to help. Maybe you have had to figure out how to manage what seemed like an impossible task all by yourself, while those around you acted like you were virtually invisible. Either they were too busy, too disinterested, or truly didn’t care enough to help you…but the result was pretty much the same. You were left feeling insignificant and unloved.
I could list other situations…but you get the picture. We’ve all “been there, done that” at one time or another. So we should all understand how terrible this feels. We should all be ready to take a look at “the other guy” and ask, “How would I feel in his/her shoes?” But time after time – for whatever reason – we seem to be too busy to exercise this “rule-of-thumb behavior” that sums up all of the laws and teachings of Jesus.
We can do better. We MUST do better! We should take a page from Jeanette Wall’s book (no pun intended!) and put aside our own feelings to consider the other person…to meet his/her needs as we feel led by the LORD… and to let HIM handle the rest. We must get to a point in our own Christian discipleship where we focus on treating others as we would like to be treated (and as God directs us)…and we allow God handle how others treat us! I get it…this is far easier said than done. But again, nothing about being a disciple of Christ is necessarily easy!
So how do we proceed? Leo Babauta, author of the blog “Zen Habits”, posted “18 Practical Tips for Living the Golden Rule”.* It’s worth a look, and I encourage you to click on the link and read through them. There is so much more that each of us can do to share love and compassion with others…and to honor the teachings of Jesus and His amazing gift of grace, mercy, forgiveness and compassion in our own lives. This may not come easily at first, but practice truly does “make perfect”…and in time, we can become far more adept at exercising this tenet in our daily living.
Babauta encourages us to do this so that we will be happier and “a better person”…so that our community will be a better place. I believe we must do this “because Jesus said so!” He has demonstrated this principle for each and every one of us. If we want to truly be His disciples, we will “pay it forward” to others...and trust Him to give us the wisdom, strength and courage to accomplish these things for His glory. I know I’m in… what about you?
©2014 Debbie Robus
*http://zenhabits.net/18-practical-tips-for-living-the-golden-rule/
Showing posts with label putting yourself in the other guy's shoes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label putting yourself in the other guy's shoes. Show all posts
Daily Devotional for January 19, 2014
1 Corinthians 9:19-23
Even though I am free of the demands and expectations of everyone, I have voluntarily become a servant to any and all in order to reach a wide range of people: religious, nonreligious, meticulous moralists, loose-living immoralists, the defeated, the demoralized—whoever. I didn’t take on their way of life. I kept my bearings in Christ—but I entered their world and tried to experience things from their point of view. I’ve become just about every sort of servant there is in my attempts to lead those I meet into a God-saved life. I did all this because of the Message. I didn’t just want to talk about it; I wanted to be in on it!
Scripture quotations from The Message. © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress, Colorado Springs, CO. All rights reserved.
In a January 3, 2014, report for the DailyMail.com, correspondent Melissa Kite describes donning a “fat suit” made in the United States for the Peterborough City Hospital in England, to the tune of over $1600US. Kite, a svelte 119 pounds (8½ stone in British terms), donned a “bariatric suit” that elevated her weight to 40 stone…or 560 pounds. The hospital is using this suit to help provide nurses with empathy for the obese patients they treat in their facility. Hite points out that over a million people are classified as “morbidly obese” in Great Britain. Given the added health risks that come with obesity, it’s a sure bet that more than handful of these folks will visit the hospital for some sort of treatment. I encourage you to read this thought-provoking report for yourself.*
I chose a fairly “mainstream” example of “putting yourself in someone else’s shoes”…but only because this is one we can physically imagine and envision. We can also visualize simulating homelessness for a weekend, restraining an arm or leg or wearing a blindfold and trying to imagine what it would be like to function without a limb or our eyesight. But how do we gain insight into the more “invisible” lives - and burdens - of others? Are we able to imagine what it would be like to be bullied? Can we truly understand the emotional anguish of someone who has suffered the loss of a child? Do you know what it feels like to be mistreated because of the color of your skin, your sexual orientation, something that happened to you in the past, your ethnicity, or your social status?
Can you possibly imagine what it is like to suffer from some form of mental illness? Have you considered the challenges that come to the family members of those who do? Are you able to truly understand what it is to wake up hungry every day… and go to bed wondering whether you will survive another? Can you relate to the terminally ill person who is facing his/her own mortality, and all of the worries and concerns for those left behind? Do you have any idea the mental and emotional torment that may plague an addict, adulterer, prostitute, gang member, or psychopath? Do you know firsthand the heartache of parents who are filled with worry and anguish over delinquent children or a child with mental, physical or emotional issues? Have you personally been charged with responsibilities of caring for an aging loved one…and had to make difficult “life decisions” in the process?
I do not believe that Paul is calling on us to literally become one of these people…even for a short term experience. But in essence, He is telling us to stop for just a minute and try to envision their world…to “put on their fat suit” in our minds and hearts…and to see what – and who – God sees. Then…and only then…will we have a shot at truly sharing the compassion – and Good News – of Christ with them. There is an adage that is attributed to several people that essentially says, “People don’t care what you know…until they know that you care.” This is what Paul is trying to share with us in this passage of scripture. So my question today for all of us is…do people know that we care? Isn’t it time they did?
©2014 Debbie Robus
*Wearing fat suits can make you sympathise with the obese...
Even though I am free of the demands and expectations of everyone, I have voluntarily become a servant to any and all in order to reach a wide range of people: religious, nonreligious, meticulous moralists, loose-living immoralists, the defeated, the demoralized—whoever. I didn’t take on their way of life. I kept my bearings in Christ—but I entered their world and tried to experience things from their point of view. I’ve become just about every sort of servant there is in my attempts to lead those I meet into a God-saved life. I did all this because of the Message. I didn’t just want to talk about it; I wanted to be in on it!
Scripture quotations from The Message. © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress, Colorado Springs, CO. All rights reserved.
In a January 3, 2014, report for the DailyMail.com, correspondent Melissa Kite describes donning a “fat suit” made in the United States for the Peterborough City Hospital in England, to the tune of over $1600US. Kite, a svelte 119 pounds (8½ stone in British terms), donned a “bariatric suit” that elevated her weight to 40 stone…or 560 pounds. The hospital is using this suit to help provide nurses with empathy for the obese patients they treat in their facility. Hite points out that over a million people are classified as “morbidly obese” in Great Britain. Given the added health risks that come with obesity, it’s a sure bet that more than handful of these folks will visit the hospital for some sort of treatment. I encourage you to read this thought-provoking report for yourself.*
I chose a fairly “mainstream” example of “putting yourself in someone else’s shoes”…but only because this is one we can physically imagine and envision. We can also visualize simulating homelessness for a weekend, restraining an arm or leg or wearing a blindfold and trying to imagine what it would be like to function without a limb or our eyesight. But how do we gain insight into the more “invisible” lives - and burdens - of others? Are we able to imagine what it would be like to be bullied? Can we truly understand the emotional anguish of someone who has suffered the loss of a child? Do you know what it feels like to be mistreated because of the color of your skin, your sexual orientation, something that happened to you in the past, your ethnicity, or your social status?
Can you possibly imagine what it is like to suffer from some form of mental illness? Have you considered the challenges that come to the family members of those who do? Are you able to truly understand what it is to wake up hungry every day… and go to bed wondering whether you will survive another? Can you relate to the terminally ill person who is facing his/her own mortality, and all of the worries and concerns for those left behind? Do you have any idea the mental and emotional torment that may plague an addict, adulterer, prostitute, gang member, or psychopath? Do you know firsthand the heartache of parents who are filled with worry and anguish over delinquent children or a child with mental, physical or emotional issues? Have you personally been charged with responsibilities of caring for an aging loved one…and had to make difficult “life decisions” in the process?
I do not believe that Paul is calling on us to literally become one of these people…even for a short term experience. But in essence, He is telling us to stop for just a minute and try to envision their world…to “put on their fat suit” in our minds and hearts…and to see what – and who – God sees. Then…and only then…will we have a shot at truly sharing the compassion – and Good News – of Christ with them. There is an adage that is attributed to several people that essentially says, “People don’t care what you know…until they know that you care.” This is what Paul is trying to share with us in this passage of scripture. So my question today for all of us is…do people know that we care? Isn’t it time they did?
©2014 Debbie Robus
*Wearing fat suits can make you sympathise with the obese...
Daily Devotional for January 5, 2014
Matthew 18:28-35
“The servant was no sooner out of the room when he came upon one of his fellow servants who owed him ten dollars. He seized him by the throat and demanded, ‘Pay up. Now!’
“The poor wretch threw himself down and begged, ‘Give me a chance and I’ll pay it all back.’ But he wouldn’t do it. He had him arrested and put in jail until the debt was paid. When the other servants saw this going on, they were outraged and brought a detailed report to the king.
“The king summoned the man and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave your entire debt when you begged me for mercy. Shouldn’t you be compelled to be merciful to your fellow servant who asked for mercy?’ The king was furious and put the screws to the man until he paid back his entire debt. And that’s exactly what my Father in heaven is going to do to each one of you who doesn’t forgive unconditionally anyone who asks for mercy.”
Scripture quotations from The Message. © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress, Colorado Springs, CO. All rights reserved.
January 3, 2014, author/blogger Ben Irwin wrote a piece for http://HuffingtonPost.com titled “20 Things the Poor Really Do Every Day”*. Irwin cited several sources for creating his list, and the points were compelling…search for affordable housing…try to make $133 worth of food last a whole month…skip a meal…work longer and harder than most of us - just to name a few. Irwin’s point was that the poor may not share the habits of the rich… but it’s not necessarily because they don’t want to…or because they are lazy or ignorant. More importantly, Irwin notes that the poor are “those with whom Jesus identifies most closely”.
As I thought about this article and how we look at people who are “less fortunate” than we are, I considered this scripture passage and Jesus’ admonition to show mercy to those who ask for it. I believe that His message extends much further. How many people in need do you know who are unabashed about asking for help or mercy? I’m sure my church’s staff might argue this point with me, because they spend every Tuesday fielding request from folks who need money or assistance from our “Pastor’s Emergency Fund” - and I am quite sure some are not the least bit embarrassed to ask repeatedly. But at the same time, I know there are people who will do without a lot of things most would consider necessities – or simply avoid certain people and situations - rather than ask for help.
There are also those who are so embarrassed and ashamed of their situation… or their behavior… that they cannot bring themselves to ask for forgiveness and/or a second chance. If you don’t believe me, ask yourself if you have ever felt you had to improve in one area or another before you approached God. It’s the same thing. We all have times when we think that we cannot rectify our situation… rebuild a relationship… or ask for help… until we get things straightened out a little more on our own. And in doing this, we rob ourselves of blessings on so many levels.
I say all this to remind each of us – myself especially – to put ourselves in the shoes of the other guy. Consider how he feels… what struggles plague him…how hard it might be for this person to ask for help – much less seek mercy and forgiveness. I am in no way suggesting that you let people run over you and take full advantage of your kindness. I’m merely suggesting that we truly offer others compassion and understanding… that we try to see things from their vantage point. Rather than demand payment or to be treated in a certain way… perhaps we should shower this person with love and gentleness. You know…treat them just like Jesus treats us! We might just find that they come around sooner...or at the very least, that we are more tenderhearted and merciful in our own thoughts and actions!
God does not want us to be “doormats” for others. But many of us have plenty of situations and relationships that are far removed from this status…yet they could use a hefty dose of grace, mercy and compassion. Are you willing to take a step back and consider the other person’s perspective? Can you operate more from a position of kindheartedness, understanding and compassion… and less from one of judgment and ultimatum? Will you offer others the same level of mercy that you desire from God? Shouldn’t you?
©2014 Debbie Robus
* http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ben-irwin/20-things-poor-people-really-do_b_4533691.html
“The servant was no sooner out of the room when he came upon one of his fellow servants who owed him ten dollars. He seized him by the throat and demanded, ‘Pay up. Now!’
“The poor wretch threw himself down and begged, ‘Give me a chance and I’ll pay it all back.’ But he wouldn’t do it. He had him arrested and put in jail until the debt was paid. When the other servants saw this going on, they were outraged and brought a detailed report to the king.
“The king summoned the man and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave your entire debt when you begged me for mercy. Shouldn’t you be compelled to be merciful to your fellow servant who asked for mercy?’ The king was furious and put the screws to the man until he paid back his entire debt. And that’s exactly what my Father in heaven is going to do to each one of you who doesn’t forgive unconditionally anyone who asks for mercy.”
Scripture quotations from The Message. © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress, Colorado Springs, CO. All rights reserved.
January 3, 2014, author/blogger Ben Irwin wrote a piece for http://HuffingtonPost.com titled “20 Things the Poor Really Do Every Day”*. Irwin cited several sources for creating his list, and the points were compelling…search for affordable housing…try to make $133 worth of food last a whole month…skip a meal…work longer and harder than most of us - just to name a few. Irwin’s point was that the poor may not share the habits of the rich… but it’s not necessarily because they don’t want to…or because they are lazy or ignorant. More importantly, Irwin notes that the poor are “those with whom Jesus identifies most closely”.
As I thought about this article and how we look at people who are “less fortunate” than we are, I considered this scripture passage and Jesus’ admonition to show mercy to those who ask for it. I believe that His message extends much further. How many people in need do you know who are unabashed about asking for help or mercy? I’m sure my church’s staff might argue this point with me, because they spend every Tuesday fielding request from folks who need money or assistance from our “Pastor’s Emergency Fund” - and I am quite sure some are not the least bit embarrassed to ask repeatedly. But at the same time, I know there are people who will do without a lot of things most would consider necessities – or simply avoid certain people and situations - rather than ask for help.
There are also those who are so embarrassed and ashamed of their situation… or their behavior… that they cannot bring themselves to ask for forgiveness and/or a second chance. If you don’t believe me, ask yourself if you have ever felt you had to improve in one area or another before you approached God. It’s the same thing. We all have times when we think that we cannot rectify our situation… rebuild a relationship… or ask for help… until we get things straightened out a little more on our own. And in doing this, we rob ourselves of blessings on so many levels.
I say all this to remind each of us – myself especially – to put ourselves in the shoes of the other guy. Consider how he feels… what struggles plague him…how hard it might be for this person to ask for help – much less seek mercy and forgiveness. I am in no way suggesting that you let people run over you and take full advantage of your kindness. I’m merely suggesting that we truly offer others compassion and understanding… that we try to see things from their vantage point. Rather than demand payment or to be treated in a certain way… perhaps we should shower this person with love and gentleness. You know…treat them just like Jesus treats us! We might just find that they come around sooner...or at the very least, that we are more tenderhearted and merciful in our own thoughts and actions!
God does not want us to be “doormats” for others. But many of us have plenty of situations and relationships that are far removed from this status…yet they could use a hefty dose of grace, mercy and compassion. Are you willing to take a step back and consider the other person’s perspective? Can you operate more from a position of kindheartedness, understanding and compassion… and less from one of judgment and ultimatum? Will you offer others the same level of mercy that you desire from God? Shouldn’t you?
©2014 Debbie Robus
* http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ben-irwin/20-things-poor-people-really-do_b_4533691.html
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)