Psalm 94:18-19
When I felt my feet slipping, you came with your love and kept me steady. And when I was burdened with worries, you comforted me and made me feel secure.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Sometimes “life” kicks us in the gut… and for me, the 1990s was a long decade of “gut-checks”. In July 1992, my father-in-law died suddenly from an aortic aneurysm. He was not quite 70, and we were shocked and stunned by his unexpected passing. In October 1997, my dad underwent a “routine” arteriogram to search for coronary blockage. A few hours later, he was fighting for his life, as “cholesterol showering” had caused shavings and sprinkles of cholesterol plaque to block his kidneys and other body organs. By November, he was in full-blown renal failure and placed on dialysis.
My dad spent much of the next six months in and out of hospitals (mostly in). While we “carried on” with a family Thanksgiving meal, my mom ate her turkey dinner in a hospital cafeteria. A sudden life-threatening episode sent Daddy back to Little Rock to the hospital in the early morning hours of Christmas Eve… so we celebrated a week later when he returned home. By February, the doctors had told him that there was no cure… that he could choose to stop dialysis and probably live only a couple of weeks longer. Daddy chose to keep going.
Meanwhile, my 37-year-old brother, Tim, was battling liver failure. He would have good days, and very bad days… and in September 1998, his body gave out. Thirteen months later, my dad would undergo a “routine” surgery followed by a massive stroke the next day… and then he suffered a fatal heart attack. As if this were not all more than enough to bear, Tim’s beloved dog Carmen (who had become Mom’s constant companion) contracted tick fever in the spring of 2000 and died. AND… my Mam-ma Polly’s dear companion of seven years, Deb, succumbed to bladder cancer. I’d call all of this a “gut-check”… wouldn’t you?
Today, I learned that a dear friend – and fellow church member – is getting her own “kick in the gut”. Her husband died in February. Just a few weeks ago, her dog became very ill and had to be put down… and now she has learned that her brother’s oncologist is saying things have taken a drastic turn, and he probably only has 2 weeks or less to live. Sometimes, life is incredibly messy – even for the most faith-filled Christians. I would imagine that my friend very much feels like her feet are slipping… that she is burdened with worries and insecurities and wondering how on earth she will ever put one foot ahead of the other again.
Here’s where Psalm 94:18-19 comes in - and why I shared these personal experiences with you…when our feet begin to slip, the worries and insecurities overcome us and sheer panic sets in. God is there to lift us up and keep us steady. He will carry us when we cannot walk. He will comfort us and make us feel secure. He will do this by sending friends and family members to surround us. God will allow our own messy “gut-checks” to serve as encouragement for others as we say, “He got us through this… and He’ll get you through, also.”
I don’t mean to diminish grief and suffering. Just writing a note of encouragement to my friend brought back a flood of thoughts and memories of my own brother and all we shared in his last days. But at the end of the day, I have tremendous peace. I have experienced incredible joy and blessings in the last 2+ decades… even in the midst of great sorrow and loss. And it’s all because God’s love came and kept me steady. What He has done for me… He will most certainly do for you.
Many are worried and burdened today… and you may be among them. I want you to feel God’s presence. As your feet begin to slip, feel His hands under your arms…lifting you and steadying your gait. Recognize the rhythms of God’s steady breathing as He draws you close to Him and says, “I’ve got this!” Relax and sink deep into His loving arms… rest in His peace… trust Him. This will most likely not change the outcome of your circumstances… but it will change how you are affected by them.
God understands your grief and sadness… your frustration and pain. These are natural reactions. But He offers supernatural peace and reassurance. Take refuge in His nurture and safekeeping. Know that God is leading others to pray for you… to love you and serve as His hands and feet on this earth. Don’t let your “gut-check” become a fatal blow. Feel the steady “grip of grace” that surrounds you… and rest in God’s peace - today and always.
©2013 Debbie Robus
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