Matthew 7:12
“Do for others what you want them to do for you. This is the teaching of the laws of Moses in a nutshell."
The
Living Bible copyright © 1971 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by
permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois
60188. All rights reserved.
Social media is blowing up
today with posts about 9/11/2001. Almost everyone has a “9/11 story”…if
only to say, “I remember where I was when it happened.” And we do
remember all of the horrific, devastating, life-altering events of that
day - and the days/weeks that followed. May God grant His peace and
comfort to all who were directly or indirectly affected by that
tragedy…and in one way or another, this includes all of us.
Having
said this, I wonder just how much we do remember about 9/11…because in
that moment, many of us came together in extraordinary ways. We dropped
the judgments and the pretenses, and we became friends helping friends,
neighbors supporting neighbors…Christian brothers and sisters loving
others. And I have to ask…what has happened to us in the last fourteen
years?
The backbiting and judgment, hatred and fear seem to be at
all-time highs. Because of our access to “instant media,” we not only
know more about this…we are able to perpetuate it. “Did you hear what
XYZ said or ABC did?” we ask almost giddily. We cannot wait to revel in
the latest come-uppance of someone who played “high and mighty” in some
way - and we are more than a little eager to knock him/her down a peg.
We set ourselves apart from the masses and pretend that we have no
problems – or shortcomings and downright failures…that we are just a
smidge better than the next guy.
Or…we look at others, throw up
our hands, and say, “Not my problem!” The current refugee crisis in
Syria…and the hungry and homeless (both the 2-legged and four-legged
varities) in our own community immediately come to mind. What happened
to the spirit of camaraderie that followed 9/11? What happened to
working together rather than picking each other apart? How have we lost
our way so badly?
In her book, For the Love*,
author Jen Hatmaker says, “We are not good gods over one another; we are
better humans beside each other.” Matthew 7:12 is known by many as
“The Golden Rule”…and indeed, its words encompass a hallmark by which we
are all called to live. It’s time we got started…and I can’t think of a
better day than this one.
©2015 Debbie Robus
*For The Love
- ©2015 Thomas Nelson Books for HarperCollins Christian Publishing,
Inc.
Showing posts with label avoiding conflict judgment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label avoiding conflict judgment. Show all posts
Daily Devotional for August 20, 2015
Leviticus 19:18
Stop being angry and don’t try to take revenge. I am the Lord, and I command you to love others as much as you love yourself.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Do you know someone who is so angry with another person that he/she cannot be in the same room with them? I am sad to say that I do. I know people who can barely be civil to each other and speak a few words - much less share space. I also know people who are so bitter and angry that they have sought ways to harm another person – mentally and emotionally, if not physically. The energy and emotion expended by these folks is exhausting – and sad. And I believe that this breaks God’s heart.
I count myself blessed to say that I have never been one to hold a grudge – at least not for very long. I have people with whom I have established mental and physical boundaries. There are a few folks with whom I have little contact, because it’s just better that way for both of us. There are certain situations and events that I avoid, because I know that they will either offer the opportunity for conflict – or there is a potential for discussions and actions that might upset me. But I do not avoid such people or situations out of judgment or disdain - and certainly not out of anger.
God has shown me how to handle potentially upsetting and unpleasant people and situations. Once in a while, such an encounter will be inevitable. But I have asked Him to guide me…to keep me calm and collected…and to shield me from any lasting feelings of ill will or displeasure. I have asked God to give me a heart for forgiveness and compassion toward others…even those who “rub me the wrong way” in some manner. And while I am a work in progress, I can say that He has generously granted me great peace in this area.
Conflicts and difficult folks are an inevitable part of life. But God wants us to allow Him to handle these people and situations. He wants us to focus on loving all people – at all times. He wants us to offer others kindness…to share a smile and a loving attitude - even when we feel that the person doesn’t deserve it! I get that this is sometimes hard to accomplish…I truly do. But I can assure you that when you surrender these feelings to God and allow Him to handle things, you will experience inexplicable peace and calm. This may not happen instantly, but God will soothe and settle you.
Don’t try to take matters into your own hands…and don’t let anger and resentments fester. Spend some time in prayer and meditation, and ask God to show you how to control your feelings…and to surround you with peace and calm as you surrender these people and situations to Him. Ask God to fill your heart with love and compassion…and let Him handle the rest. He will do this…are you ready to let Him?
©2015 Debbie Robus
Stop being angry and don’t try to take revenge. I am the Lord, and I command you to love others as much as you love yourself.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Do you know someone who is so angry with another person that he/she cannot be in the same room with them? I am sad to say that I do. I know people who can barely be civil to each other and speak a few words - much less share space. I also know people who are so bitter and angry that they have sought ways to harm another person – mentally and emotionally, if not physically. The energy and emotion expended by these folks is exhausting – and sad. And I believe that this breaks God’s heart.
I count myself blessed to say that I have never been one to hold a grudge – at least not for very long. I have people with whom I have established mental and physical boundaries. There are a few folks with whom I have little contact, because it’s just better that way for both of us. There are certain situations and events that I avoid, because I know that they will either offer the opportunity for conflict – or there is a potential for discussions and actions that might upset me. But I do not avoid such people or situations out of judgment or disdain - and certainly not out of anger.
God has shown me how to handle potentially upsetting and unpleasant people and situations. Once in a while, such an encounter will be inevitable. But I have asked Him to guide me…to keep me calm and collected…and to shield me from any lasting feelings of ill will or displeasure. I have asked God to give me a heart for forgiveness and compassion toward others…even those who “rub me the wrong way” in some manner. And while I am a work in progress, I can say that He has generously granted me great peace in this area.
Conflicts and difficult folks are an inevitable part of life. But God wants us to allow Him to handle these people and situations. He wants us to focus on loving all people – at all times. He wants us to offer others kindness…to share a smile and a loving attitude - even when we feel that the person doesn’t deserve it! I get that this is sometimes hard to accomplish…I truly do. But I can assure you that when you surrender these feelings to God and allow Him to handle things, you will experience inexplicable peace and calm. This may not happen instantly, but God will soothe and settle you.
Don’t try to take matters into your own hands…and don’t let anger and resentments fester. Spend some time in prayer and meditation, and ask God to show you how to control your feelings…and to surround you with peace and calm as you surrender these people and situations to Him. Ask God to fill your heart with love and compassion…and let Him handle the rest. He will do this…are you ready to let Him?
©2015 Debbie Robus
Daily Devotional for May 30, 2015
1 Corinthians 10:30-31
If I can thank God for the food and enjoy it, why let someone spoil everything just because he thinks I am wrong? Well, I’ll tell you why. It is because you must do everything for the glory of God, even your eating and drinking.
The Living Bible copyright © 1971 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
When our nephew John was about three or four, he went to visit Greg’s parents. During one of the meals, Grandma “E” served corn on the cob. When she put John’s plate in front of him, he came unhinged. There were no “things”! Grandma “E” could not figure out at first what he was talking about…but she quickly realized that he needed “handles” for his corn…namely, those yellow skewers that look like miniature ears of corn – the ones that you get in the kitchen section at a department store! These were what his mother had…didn’t everyone have them? Well, Grandma “E” did not have those (she did shortly thereafter!), and in what I thought was a stroke of genius, she stuck toothpicks into either end of Johnny’s ear of corn, and he reluctantly used those for handles!
The absence of those yellow “corn” skewers did not alter the ear of corn. It didn’t change how it was grown – or how it tasted! But in the mind of a 3-year-old, it changed everything and was not up for negotiation! I wish I had a nickel for every time a child has looked at a food that has been presented to him/her and retorted, “Blech!” without so much as even a single taste.
We can somewhat forgive children for this, because after all, they ARE children who are still learning the art of polite behavior. But I have seen adults turn up their noses and refuse to sample something with embarrassing fanfare. I have seen grown men and women refuse to eat a casserole because “different foods were touching!” I saw beauty, fashion and home design editors for some of the country’s top magazines turn up their noses at beautiful trays of bite-sized pieces of catfish, carefully prepared by a wonderful New York City chef. People who would not give a second thought to spearing a snail from its shell in a fancy French restaurant waved the tray away, and with an air of superiority, uttered… “No, thank you!” For the record, those who actually dared to sample the fried tidbits LOVED them and were immediate converts!
What Paul is telling the Corinthians here is about more than just food or our dining customs. Paul is telling us that we need to get over ourselves. Just because this is not necessarily how WE have always done things does not mean that the other person is wrong – or less of a Christian...or even less of a human being, for that matter. We must not look down on the poor…or those who are less fortunate, for how they manage from day to day. We must not be judgmental and critical of those who have a different way of doing things, and we most certainly must not do this to people of other cultures and ethnicities. We must remember that God made them, just as He created us…and how we treat them must glorify and honor Him at every turn. We must also not criticize others for their worship style or how they demonstrate their faith.
We all get too caught up in the “that’s-not-how-it’s-done” way of thinking. From even the littlest things like “my roommate or spouse doesn’t fold the towels like I do” to “what kind of mother lets her kids go out looking like that” to “we never did it like that at my other church/school/team/club/place of work”…our words and actions are often not the kind that glorify God and honor all that He has done for us. They do not say to others, “God loves us and wants ALL of us to belong to Him…not just the chosen few who ‘do everything my way’.”
Change is never easy…and some of us have been stuck in our ways for a long, long time! But if we want to glorify God and honor Him, we have to be willing to make the effort to set aside our own egos and see the bigger picture. Let's face it...you may still like to eat your corn on the cob with those little yellow skewers, but at least you’ll know that it tastes the same, either way. We must learn that there is often a difference between compromising your Christian values and doing things in another manner than the one you prefer. As long as God is exalted and respected, considering and accommodating another person’s feelings may be best for all concerned.
©2015 Debbie Robus
If I can thank God for the food and enjoy it, why let someone spoil everything just because he thinks I am wrong? Well, I’ll tell you why. It is because you must do everything for the glory of God, even your eating and drinking.
The Living Bible copyright © 1971 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
When our nephew John was about three or four, he went to visit Greg’s parents. During one of the meals, Grandma “E” served corn on the cob. When she put John’s plate in front of him, he came unhinged. There were no “things”! Grandma “E” could not figure out at first what he was talking about…but she quickly realized that he needed “handles” for his corn…namely, those yellow skewers that look like miniature ears of corn – the ones that you get in the kitchen section at a department store! These were what his mother had…didn’t everyone have them? Well, Grandma “E” did not have those (she did shortly thereafter!), and in what I thought was a stroke of genius, she stuck toothpicks into either end of Johnny’s ear of corn, and he reluctantly used those for handles!
The absence of those yellow “corn” skewers did not alter the ear of corn. It didn’t change how it was grown – or how it tasted! But in the mind of a 3-year-old, it changed everything and was not up for negotiation! I wish I had a nickel for every time a child has looked at a food that has been presented to him/her and retorted, “Blech!” without so much as even a single taste.
We can somewhat forgive children for this, because after all, they ARE children who are still learning the art of polite behavior. But I have seen adults turn up their noses and refuse to sample something with embarrassing fanfare. I have seen grown men and women refuse to eat a casserole because “different foods were touching!” I saw beauty, fashion and home design editors for some of the country’s top magazines turn up their noses at beautiful trays of bite-sized pieces of catfish, carefully prepared by a wonderful New York City chef. People who would not give a second thought to spearing a snail from its shell in a fancy French restaurant waved the tray away, and with an air of superiority, uttered… “No, thank you!” For the record, those who actually dared to sample the fried tidbits LOVED them and were immediate converts!
What Paul is telling the Corinthians here is about more than just food or our dining customs. Paul is telling us that we need to get over ourselves. Just because this is not necessarily how WE have always done things does not mean that the other person is wrong – or less of a Christian...or even less of a human being, for that matter. We must not look down on the poor…or those who are less fortunate, for how they manage from day to day. We must not be judgmental and critical of those who have a different way of doing things, and we most certainly must not do this to people of other cultures and ethnicities. We must remember that God made them, just as He created us…and how we treat them must glorify and honor Him at every turn. We must also not criticize others for their worship style or how they demonstrate their faith.
We all get too caught up in the “that’s-not-how-it’s-done” way of thinking. From even the littlest things like “my roommate or spouse doesn’t fold the towels like I do” to “what kind of mother lets her kids go out looking like that” to “we never did it like that at my other church/school/team/club/place of work”…our words and actions are often not the kind that glorify God and honor all that He has done for us. They do not say to others, “God loves us and wants ALL of us to belong to Him…not just the chosen few who ‘do everything my way’.”
Change is never easy…and some of us have been stuck in our ways for a long, long time! But if we want to glorify God and honor Him, we have to be willing to make the effort to set aside our own egos and see the bigger picture. Let's face it...you may still like to eat your corn on the cob with those little yellow skewers, but at least you’ll know that it tastes the same, either way. We must learn that there is often a difference between compromising your Christian values and doing things in another manner than the one you prefer. As long as God is exalted and respected, considering and accommodating another person’s feelings may be best for all concerned.
©2015 Debbie Robus
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