1 Corinthians 1:10
My dear friends, as a follower of our Lord Jesus Christ, I beg you to get along with each other. Don't take sides. Always try to agree in what you think.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
One of the most difficult life experiences is the breakup of two friends. Whether they were married or not doesn’t really matter, although experiencing the divorce of friends is especially tough. If you were close to both persons, it almost always comes down to a matter of choosing “sides.” At least, both members of the couple and their “camps” usually want you to do this. To truly stay neutral and friendly with both parties is a tall order.
Equally difficult is to be friends with people who believe differently than you about such issues as politics, religion, and lifestyle choices. Even being friends with people who smoke or drink when you do not is sometimes difficult.
Paul is not saying in this scripture passage that we should change our beliefs – or even compromise them for friendship. He is saying that there are many situations in which we simply have to “agree to disagree.” I feel one way – you feel another. We can still be friends and get along – we just don’t happen to agree on this issue. I’m not “for” you nor “against” you – I’m just your friend, and I love you.
If we applied this to a lot of different situations in our lives, things would go more smoothly. In a divorce situation, we could say, “He isn’t wrong, and she isn’t right. Clearly, there is conflict and division, but I still love them both and will continue to be cordial and kind toward both of them.” It may be that in order to maintain your neutrality, you have to stop hanging out with either party. But you can still be kind and friendly and love them both. I’ve lived through more than one election where my candidate did not win. That didn’t mean I stopped speaking to friends of mine who supported the winner. It also didn’t mean I changed my mind and supported their candidate(s). It just meant that I chose to love the person and not choose “sides” in particular issues.
We learn from an early age to “choose sides.” Everything from Red Rover games to kickball has teams that are usually chosen one person at a time. And we learn to “choose sides” in arguments, debates and controversies at a young age, too. But we can “unlearn” this habit. We can make a conscious, prayerful effort to be agreeable to all … kind and loving. We can keep our opinions to ourselves – or at least keep them from affecting our relationships with our friends and neighbors. We’ll have to ask God to help us with this one, because Satan will delight in playing the “human nature” card. But it can be done … and God is more than willing to give us the strength and wisdom for this task. The real question is … are you up to the challenge?
©2010 Debbie Robus
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