Proverbs 21:21, 23
Whoever goes hunting for what is right and kind finds life itself—glorious life!
Watch your words and hold your tongue; you'll save yourself a lot of grief.
Scripture quotations from The Message. © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress, Colorado Springs, CO. All rights reserved.
Each October, an event is held in our community called “Early Decades.” It is basically a giant class reunion for all students of Heber Springs High School who graduated at least 30 years ago – or longer. The class who graduated 50 years ago hosts a banquet on Saturday night and presents the program. I did not attend last year, but I’ve read a transcript of the program, presented by Class of 1960 president, Gary Thomas. His program was about the “Dam Kids”… children whose families moved to our area to help with the construction of Greers Ferry Dam. Some were not treated so kindly… in large part because of resentments by local landowners over the government’s claim on their land to create Greers Ferry Lake.
However, Gary had a different experience. He spoke of many people in this area who befriended him… and he specifically named several who showed him great kindnesses. By the same token, on a Facebook page that recalls people and events in and around our community, many have cited teachers and leaders who were especially kind to them… who made a difference… people whom they have never forgotten. Some gave them wise advice… others gave them a hand or a hug when they needed it… but all did what was right and kind.
Perhaps you have known such people already in your own life. Or maybe, like the “Dam Kids”, you haven’t been treated so well. Either way, the Bible is clear on how we are supposed to behave… and that means hunting for what is right and kind… and watching what we say and how we say it.
In my work with elderly adults – and in talking with others who are caring for their elders – I hear often that “Mom treats me terribly,” or “Dad is so mean to me” – or even, “Grandma/Grandpa was really ugly to me/the nurse or caregiver/the neighbor/a dear friend.” The old adage about “biting the hand that feeds you” often plays out in eldercare. And while I know the sting of hurting words and actions in this situation is real – and deep – I also know that these are often very loving people who are acting out of a deep frustration… or dementia and illness. So we have to somewhat give them a “free pass”… show them grace and mercy, just as God shows us.
On the other hand, we do not have such a license to misbehave. For the most part, every person reading this message is able-bodied and of reasonably sound mind. We cannot ask others to excuse our thoughtless words or unkind gestures… much less expect God to look the other way. We must humbly and sincerely ask God to guide our thoughts and our deeds – every single day. We must ask Him to check our impulses to lash out at another… or to “speak our mind” in a brash, insensitive way. We have to ask God to help us conduct our daily lives in a way that honors Him and enables others to see His love in action.
If we “take the high road” and prayerfully walk in love and kindness… carefully choosing our words and our actions… others will see our restraint. They will know that there are times when our composure could have only come from God, and they will be inspired to pay it forward. And better than this, God will be pleased that we listened and trusted Him to work in and through us for a glorious life.
I’m glad that there have been others in my life who showed me kindness and bit their tongue. I’m thankful for teachers and leaders who have shown kindness to “kids” for countless generations. But I’m even more thankful for a God who teaches us to operate in restraint and love… and to reap the innumerable blessings that come as a result.
©2011 Debbie Robus
Showing posts with label hurtful words. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hurtful words. Show all posts
Daily Devotional for June 16, 2011
Luke 17:3-4
So be careful what you do. Correct any followers of mine who sin, and forgive the ones who say they are sorry. Even if one of them mistreats you seven times in one day and says, "I am sorry," you should still forgive that person.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Years ago, I confided to my pastor about a deep hurt I had experienced. He looked at me with amazement and said, “But I’ve seen you interact with this person, and you have such a loving relationship!” I replied, “Yes, because I forgave… I had to. Otherwise, this would have eaten me alive.” He just shook his head, touched my hand and said, “God bless you… you did the right thing.” Forgiveness is a daunting challenge for most of us… especially when we have been mistreated, insulted, deceived and/or wounded repeatedly. And I will tell you, I don’t always forgive easily or readily… even when I know I should.
The sad fact is that we expect Jesus to forgive us for infractions toward Him, when we cannot forgive those who offend us. We make promises to Jesus and fail to deliver… we turn our back on Him when it suits our need to impress someone or look important – or when doing what is right would not be quite as much fun… we wound Him deeply with our inability to stay faithful and serve as He desires. And yet, He forgives us… over and over again.
So we must forgive those who mistreat us or behave badly. I didn’t say we have to accept what they do… or ignore it. Jesus tells us that we must gently correct those who do this, which means you have every right to tell another person that you do not like how they are behaving… if you feel it is harmful to you, others, or themselves. We must be very careful to judge another person’s “sin,” but we are all pretty good gauges of behavior that is unacceptable toward us or others. If you have a friend or loved one who is abusing alcohol or drugs, you should say something.
If you know someone who is acting irresponsibly, failing to show up for school or work, not taking proper care of their children or their own health and hygiene, or even mistreating their pets, you have an obligation to confront them in a loving manner. Whether you affect a change is not the issue… only God can truly help them to change. But when these people come to you and ask you to forgive them – whether they have changed temporarily or forever – you must do so. And honestly, you must forgive them even when they don’t ask. We cannot ask God to forgive us if we are not willing to forgive others.
I know this is hard. I know that there are times we all want to just give up and walk away… and there is nothing wrong with taking a break for awhile and letting the dust settle. But ultimately, we are bound by our covenant with Jesus Christ to forgive others… over and over again, if necessary.Who is seeking your forgiveness today? Who do you need to ask to forgive you? Are you ready to be a true Disciple of Christ and accept the hard challenges? Do you need to begin by asking Jesus to forgive you yet again – or to help you forgive someone else? He will… and you must. What are you waiting for? Forgiveness is only a prayer away.
©2011 Debbie Robus
So be careful what you do. Correct any followers of mine who sin, and forgive the ones who say they are sorry. Even if one of them mistreats you seven times in one day and says, "I am sorry," you should still forgive that person.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Years ago, I confided to my pastor about a deep hurt I had experienced. He looked at me with amazement and said, “But I’ve seen you interact with this person, and you have such a loving relationship!” I replied, “Yes, because I forgave… I had to. Otherwise, this would have eaten me alive.” He just shook his head, touched my hand and said, “God bless you… you did the right thing.” Forgiveness is a daunting challenge for most of us… especially when we have been mistreated, insulted, deceived and/or wounded repeatedly. And I will tell you, I don’t always forgive easily or readily… even when I know I should.
The sad fact is that we expect Jesus to forgive us for infractions toward Him, when we cannot forgive those who offend us. We make promises to Jesus and fail to deliver… we turn our back on Him when it suits our need to impress someone or look important – or when doing what is right would not be quite as much fun… we wound Him deeply with our inability to stay faithful and serve as He desires. And yet, He forgives us… over and over again.
So we must forgive those who mistreat us or behave badly. I didn’t say we have to accept what they do… or ignore it. Jesus tells us that we must gently correct those who do this, which means you have every right to tell another person that you do not like how they are behaving… if you feel it is harmful to you, others, or themselves. We must be very careful to judge another person’s “sin,” but we are all pretty good gauges of behavior that is unacceptable toward us or others. If you have a friend or loved one who is abusing alcohol or drugs, you should say something.
If you know someone who is acting irresponsibly, failing to show up for school or work, not taking proper care of their children or their own health and hygiene, or even mistreating their pets, you have an obligation to confront them in a loving manner. Whether you affect a change is not the issue… only God can truly help them to change. But when these people come to you and ask you to forgive them – whether they have changed temporarily or forever – you must do so. And honestly, you must forgive them even when they don’t ask. We cannot ask God to forgive us if we are not willing to forgive others.
I know this is hard. I know that there are times we all want to just give up and walk away… and there is nothing wrong with taking a break for awhile and letting the dust settle. But ultimately, we are bound by our covenant with Jesus Christ to forgive others… over and over again, if necessary.Who is seeking your forgiveness today? Who do you need to ask to forgive you? Are you ready to be a true Disciple of Christ and accept the hard challenges? Do you need to begin by asking Jesus to forgive you yet again – or to help you forgive someone else? He will… and you must. What are you waiting for? Forgiveness is only a prayer away.
©2011 Debbie Robus
Daily Devotional for May 22, 2011
Proverbs 20:3
It makes you look good when you avoid a fight -- only fools love to quarrel.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Do you know someone who comes in the door trying to pick a fight? It’s really hard to even have a conversation with this person, because he/she takes everything you say the wrong way – or there is potential for this to happen. Those who love to quarrel often have a way of drawing you into their argument before you even realize what is happening.
Pretty soon, you notice that people are avoiding this person altogether, because it’s easier than risking getting into an argument… and the person who loves to argue starts to look rather foolish and sad.
Often we do find ourselves drawn into an argument before we realize what is happening. So the challenge is to stay on guard and to hold our tongue… to think before we speak, and to choose our words carefully. We’ve all heard the recommendation to “count to ten” before we speak in these situations. Just recently I read an article by an expert who suggested we needed to count longer – maybe even to 100! I’m not sure that is necessary, but give yourself a few seconds to collect your thoughts and calm your nerves… and quietly ask God to give you the right things to say and a loving demeanor.
I have not always chosen my words carefully in these situations… and regretfully, I’ve come off looking as foolish as the other guy. I have to tell you, there is a lot of satisfaction in knowing you walked away from a quarrel without losing your cool. In those situations, I am very quick to thank God… because I know I could never do that under my own steam.
I pray that we would all learn to control our emotions… and our words… as we grow in our walk with God. I pray that we would learn to stop more often and count to ten… or twenty or thirty… and give ourselves time to ask God for His strength and wisdom. I pray that we would “take the high road” and walk away with our integrity… claws retracted and reputation intact! I pray that God would work in each of us to develop this ability more thoroughly… and may your arguments and quarrels become less frequent… and far less foolish.
©2011 Debbie Robus
It makes you look good when you avoid a fight -- only fools love to quarrel.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Do you know someone who comes in the door trying to pick a fight? It’s really hard to even have a conversation with this person, because he/she takes everything you say the wrong way – or there is potential for this to happen. Those who love to quarrel often have a way of drawing you into their argument before you even realize what is happening.
Pretty soon, you notice that people are avoiding this person altogether, because it’s easier than risking getting into an argument… and the person who loves to argue starts to look rather foolish and sad.
Often we do find ourselves drawn into an argument before we realize what is happening. So the challenge is to stay on guard and to hold our tongue… to think before we speak, and to choose our words carefully. We’ve all heard the recommendation to “count to ten” before we speak in these situations. Just recently I read an article by an expert who suggested we needed to count longer – maybe even to 100! I’m not sure that is necessary, but give yourself a few seconds to collect your thoughts and calm your nerves… and quietly ask God to give you the right things to say and a loving demeanor.
I have not always chosen my words carefully in these situations… and regretfully, I’ve come off looking as foolish as the other guy. I have to tell you, there is a lot of satisfaction in knowing you walked away from a quarrel without losing your cool. In those situations, I am very quick to thank God… because I know I could never do that under my own steam.
I pray that we would all learn to control our emotions… and our words… as we grow in our walk with God. I pray that we would learn to stop more often and count to ten… or twenty or thirty… and give ourselves time to ask God for His strength and wisdom. I pray that we would “take the high road” and walk away with our integrity… claws retracted and reputation intact! I pray that God would work in each of us to develop this ability more thoroughly… and may your arguments and quarrels become less frequent… and far less foolish.
©2011 Debbie Robus
Daily Devotional for May 7, 2011
Proverbs 16:27-28
Worthless people plan trouble. Even their words burn like a flaming fire. Gossip is no good! It causes hard feelings and comes between friends.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
I recently purchased a box of vintage linens at an estate auction. When I got home, I carefully sorted through the things in the box and washed many of them to starch and iron and prepare for sale. You never know what you will find in a box of old linens. Some things are perfect… practically brand new… like they were never used. Others are stained, frayed, and worn. But most still have some use in them – even if they bear the marks of continued usage and/or abuse.
In the box were twelve beautiful crocheted cotton placemats. The lines and the workmanship were fairly simple but still represented a huge amount of work and care. Most were completely intact and nearly perfect in condition. However, one had some tatters in a small area. Another had a tiny fray. And yet another had a slight stain. In all, the whole set still has quality, and once a table is set with the placemats, the tiny tatters and stains will hardly be noticeable… if at all. Yet they are there, and the integrity of those three placemats has – to some degree – been compromised.
As I pressed these placemats, I thought about these two verses from Proverbs… how poorly chosen words and venomous gossip create a stain and tatters in relationships. Sometimes, these can be mended… the rough edges and tears in the heart can be smoothed and covered. But the stain or tear still remains. The hurt may heal – the person who spoke harshly or spread the gossip may be forgiven. But the damage is done… and sometimes, no repair can be made.
Like the stain on a placemat that can be covered with tableware, hurtful words can be covered… but the “stain” is still there. And we, as Christians, are sometimes the very people who put the stain on someone’s heart or reputation with our ill-chosen words.
Sometimes, we don’t really even know the people about whom we gossip or say unkind things. And maybe we figure that, because we really don’t know them – and they will never know what we said about them – it doesn’t really hurt anything or anyone. But the truth is that people are watching – and listening. If even one person is influenced by our negative or unkind words… that’s one too many. The integrity of our Christian witness is compromised.
Ask God to show you how to control your thoughts before you speak… and ultimately what comes out of your mouth. Don’t be known as someone who is mean or worthless… a gossip that spreads lies and breaks up friendships… a troublemaker who is always trying to stir up others’ feelings. This is not Godly behavior… and it doesn’t please our Heavenly Father one bit!
Be who God has called you to be… a wise, careful, thoughtful person who prayerfully considers what to say before engaging the tongue. In The Message, Proverbs 16:25 says “There’s a way that looks harmless enough: look again – it leads straight to hell.” Ask God if what you are about to say about someone or a certain situation is really harmless… and let Him lead you in the right direction and toward a wise decision for yourself… and for all concerned.
©2011 Debbie Robus
Worthless people plan trouble. Even their words burn like a flaming fire. Gossip is no good! It causes hard feelings and comes between friends.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
I recently purchased a box of vintage linens at an estate auction. When I got home, I carefully sorted through the things in the box and washed many of them to starch and iron and prepare for sale. You never know what you will find in a box of old linens. Some things are perfect… practically brand new… like they were never used. Others are stained, frayed, and worn. But most still have some use in them – even if they bear the marks of continued usage and/or abuse.
In the box were twelve beautiful crocheted cotton placemats. The lines and the workmanship were fairly simple but still represented a huge amount of work and care. Most were completely intact and nearly perfect in condition. However, one had some tatters in a small area. Another had a tiny fray. And yet another had a slight stain. In all, the whole set still has quality, and once a table is set with the placemats, the tiny tatters and stains will hardly be noticeable… if at all. Yet they are there, and the integrity of those three placemats has – to some degree – been compromised.
As I pressed these placemats, I thought about these two verses from Proverbs… how poorly chosen words and venomous gossip create a stain and tatters in relationships. Sometimes, these can be mended… the rough edges and tears in the heart can be smoothed and covered. But the stain or tear still remains. The hurt may heal – the person who spoke harshly or spread the gossip may be forgiven. But the damage is done… and sometimes, no repair can be made.
Like the stain on a placemat that can be covered with tableware, hurtful words can be covered… but the “stain” is still there. And we, as Christians, are sometimes the very people who put the stain on someone’s heart or reputation with our ill-chosen words.
Sometimes, we don’t really even know the people about whom we gossip or say unkind things. And maybe we figure that, because we really don’t know them – and they will never know what we said about them – it doesn’t really hurt anything or anyone. But the truth is that people are watching – and listening. If even one person is influenced by our negative or unkind words… that’s one too many. The integrity of our Christian witness is compromised.
Ask God to show you how to control your thoughts before you speak… and ultimately what comes out of your mouth. Don’t be known as someone who is mean or worthless… a gossip that spreads lies and breaks up friendships… a troublemaker who is always trying to stir up others’ feelings. This is not Godly behavior… and it doesn’t please our Heavenly Father one bit!
Be who God has called you to be… a wise, careful, thoughtful person who prayerfully considers what to say before engaging the tongue. In The Message, Proverbs 16:25 says “There’s a way that looks harmless enough: look again – it leads straight to hell.” Ask God if what you are about to say about someone or a certain situation is really harmless… and let Him lead you in the right direction and toward a wise decision for yourself… and for all concerned.
©2011 Debbie Robus
Daily Devotional for April 15, 2011
Proverbs 12:18-19, 22
Rash language cuts and maims, but there is healing in the words of the wise. Truth lasts; lies are here today, gone tomorrow.
God can't stomach liars; he loves the company of those who keep their word.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
I have worked with some great people in my lifetime. I’ve gotten acquainted with some people of tremendous integrity and moral fiber… people who truly put the interests of others above their own and always do the right thing, even in situations where that is a darn tough choice! I’ve also encountered some people who would step over their own grandmother to make themselves look better. These people lie so often that nobody knows if – or when – they have uttered anything resembling the truth. A lot of people have been hurt along the way by this dishonesty… and I can assure you, God is not pleased by these lies.
In “the heat of the moment,” we often say and do things that are hurtful… dishonest… outrageous… disrespectful. And the effect of these behaviors can be powerful. Some of us become so skilled at distorting the facts that we honestly don’t know what is true and what isn’t any more. And some people know they are lying… and simply don’t care!
Early on, God blessed me with enough examples of honest people who “took the high road” to see that nothing good comes from lies and hurtful words. And while I am sure that I am still sometimes guilty of saying something rash and sharp, I pray that more often, I bite my tongue or find a way of expressing my viewpoint in a kind and loving manner. I have seen firsthand how God blesses this type of behavior.
Be assured that retaliating toward a bully will not get you anywhere. While it may seem like walking away and “taking it” is the coward’s way… it’s not. God will sustain you. He will give you what you need… and in the long run, YOU will be the one who is blessed. When people cheat you out of what is rightfully yours, know that God will make things right. I’m not talking about revenge… although that may be what God chooses to enact. But God will bless you for your honesty and integrity. It may take years… you may have to wait until you get to Heaven… but He will bless you for honoring Him in this way.
Sadly, Satan is the author of lies… and he has plenty of willing agents to present them. He has cheaters and deadbeats and vindictive people on every street corner, waiting to challenge our faith and our Spiritual integrity. Do not be fooled… do not fall into this trap. Take the High Road… walk above the dishonesty and stay close to Jesus. He will see you through… He will bless your loyalty. You will look back and realize that these tests have made you stronger and fortified your relationship with the One who matters… and you’ll be thankful for God’s gifts of wisdom and courage… and the healing of lasting truth.
©2011 Debbie Robus
Rash language cuts and maims, but there is healing in the words of the wise. Truth lasts; lies are here today, gone tomorrow.
God can't stomach liars; he loves the company of those who keep their word.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
I have worked with some great people in my lifetime. I’ve gotten acquainted with some people of tremendous integrity and moral fiber… people who truly put the interests of others above their own and always do the right thing, even in situations where that is a darn tough choice! I’ve also encountered some people who would step over their own grandmother to make themselves look better. These people lie so often that nobody knows if – or when – they have uttered anything resembling the truth. A lot of people have been hurt along the way by this dishonesty… and I can assure you, God is not pleased by these lies.
In “the heat of the moment,” we often say and do things that are hurtful… dishonest… outrageous… disrespectful. And the effect of these behaviors can be powerful. Some of us become so skilled at distorting the facts that we honestly don’t know what is true and what isn’t any more. And some people know they are lying… and simply don’t care!
Early on, God blessed me with enough examples of honest people who “took the high road” to see that nothing good comes from lies and hurtful words. And while I am sure that I am still sometimes guilty of saying something rash and sharp, I pray that more often, I bite my tongue or find a way of expressing my viewpoint in a kind and loving manner. I have seen firsthand how God blesses this type of behavior.
Be assured that retaliating toward a bully will not get you anywhere. While it may seem like walking away and “taking it” is the coward’s way… it’s not. God will sustain you. He will give you what you need… and in the long run, YOU will be the one who is blessed. When people cheat you out of what is rightfully yours, know that God will make things right. I’m not talking about revenge… although that may be what God chooses to enact. But God will bless you for your honesty and integrity. It may take years… you may have to wait until you get to Heaven… but He will bless you for honoring Him in this way.
Sadly, Satan is the author of lies… and he has plenty of willing agents to present them. He has cheaters and deadbeats and vindictive people on every street corner, waiting to challenge our faith and our Spiritual integrity. Do not be fooled… do not fall into this trap. Take the High Road… walk above the dishonesty and stay close to Jesus. He will see you through… He will bless your loyalty. You will look back and realize that these tests have made you stronger and fortified your relationship with the One who matters… and you’ll be thankful for God’s gifts of wisdom and courage… and the healing of lasting truth.
©2011 Debbie Robus
Daily Devotional for March 27, 2011
James 1:26
If you think you are being religious, but can't control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and everything you do is useless.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Suppose someone posted a comment on Facebook and criticized a group of people who practice a certain lifestyle, or are of a certain race or ethnicity. And suppose that person was a teacher/nurse/community leader/Sunday-school teacher/self-professed Christian. For instance… what if one of these people posted a comment that “I’m tired of the way the people on XYZ dress so gay,” or “I won’t go to such-and-such part of town because that’s where the ABC (insert your ethnicity, race, or socio-economic group here) people live or hang out.” It’s certainly the right of anyone in America to post such comments… free speech, you know.
But how do you suppose this makes the person making the comment appear to others? If the comment was made by a nurse who works in a local clinic, do you suppose that the people to whom he/she referred will feel welcome and treated fairly there in the future? If the comment was made by a teacher, do you think his/her students will feel they receive respect and fair treatment in the classroom if they fall into the category about which this person “vented?” If this statement was made by a supposed Christian, will the people to whom he/she referred truly feel the love of Christ demonstrated by this person?
Think about it. When we wear a T-shirt that says “Abortion Kills” we very well may be making an accurate statement… and we may feel that we need to say something this shocking and to the point to get others’ attention. But consider how the teenage girl who has had an abortion feels when she encounters someone wearing one of these shirts. Will she feel that she is loved and accepted by this person… or will she feel condemned? Will she feel like she could ever be loved by Jesus Christ… or will she just feel like a hopeless murderer?
We are well within our rights to say lots of things… but that doesn’t mean we should say them. And it’s not because we are involved in a particular profession, working in a church, a parent/coach/political leader – or even a Christian. It’s not about being held to higher standards necessarily or being expected to behave better because of our “station” in life (although that’s not necessarily a bad thing). It’s about our example to others… the message we convey. Because we are Christians – disciples of Jesus Christ… we must carefully guard what we say at all times.
I know I’ve worn out the clichés that “People are always watching” and “Words are like toothpaste – once they are out, it’s hard to put them back!” But the truth is, sometimes our words – even if we feel they are right or it’s our moral obligation to share them – can hurt the cause for Christianity. And people are watching. We can often do more harm than good with the words we utter.
When we say something that causes another person to feel badly about himself/herself – particularly with regard to the love, grace and mercy offered by our Heavenly Father… if we plant even the slightest seed of doubt or question that God could love this person who practices an alternative lifestyle, is of a different race or ethnicity, or doesn’t fit our socio-economic standards… we have betrayed our own faith and truly served the wrong master. We’ve left the door wide open for Satan, and said, “You’re not good enough for Jesus… but there’s room for you in Hell.”
This may seem harsh and melodramatic. But I’ve seen the hurt and devastation in the hearts and lives of those at whom such seemingly “innocent” comments were directed. I’ve heard them say, “There’s no place for me in the church,” and watched them shrink from becoming part of a church family – or even accepting Christ as their Savior – because they felt unworthy, based on the attitudes and judgments of others. It breaks my heart to see this… but I can’t begin to imagine what it must do to Jesus. He gave so much for ALL of us… and we just don’t seem to get it much of the time. He told us clearly in the scripture to love others as we love ourselves… and HOW to love one another… and we still can’t seem to get it right.
All I am asking is that we guard our thoughts and take a deep breath before we speak – or post – or judge. Let’s ask ourselves… “Will this further the Kingdom of God… or will it do more harm than good?” It wouldn’t hurt to stop and utter a prayer and ask God to help us decide which way to go! Once we have a clear direction, we can proceed… confident that God is pleased with our words and actions… and that His will is being done. We won’t have to worry about retracting our words or deeds… if we just take a little time to prayerfully consider them in the first place.
©2011 Debbie Robus
If you think you are being religious, but can't control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and everything you do is useless.
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
Suppose someone posted a comment on Facebook and criticized a group of people who practice a certain lifestyle, or are of a certain race or ethnicity. And suppose that person was a teacher/nurse/community leader/Sunday-school teacher/self-professed Christian. For instance… what if one of these people posted a comment that “I’m tired of the way the people on XYZ dress so gay,” or “I won’t go to such-and-such part of town because that’s where the ABC (insert your ethnicity, race, or socio-economic group here) people live or hang out.” It’s certainly the right of anyone in America to post such comments… free speech, you know.
But how do you suppose this makes the person making the comment appear to others? If the comment was made by a nurse who works in a local clinic, do you suppose that the people to whom he/she referred will feel welcome and treated fairly there in the future? If the comment was made by a teacher, do you think his/her students will feel they receive respect and fair treatment in the classroom if they fall into the category about which this person “vented?” If this statement was made by a supposed Christian, will the people to whom he/she referred truly feel the love of Christ demonstrated by this person?
Think about it. When we wear a T-shirt that says “Abortion Kills” we very well may be making an accurate statement… and we may feel that we need to say something this shocking and to the point to get others’ attention. But consider how the teenage girl who has had an abortion feels when she encounters someone wearing one of these shirts. Will she feel that she is loved and accepted by this person… or will she feel condemned? Will she feel like she could ever be loved by Jesus Christ… or will she just feel like a hopeless murderer?
We are well within our rights to say lots of things… but that doesn’t mean we should say them. And it’s not because we are involved in a particular profession, working in a church, a parent/coach/political leader – or even a Christian. It’s not about being held to higher standards necessarily or being expected to behave better because of our “station” in life (although that’s not necessarily a bad thing). It’s about our example to others… the message we convey. Because we are Christians – disciples of Jesus Christ… we must carefully guard what we say at all times.
I know I’ve worn out the clichés that “People are always watching” and “Words are like toothpaste – once they are out, it’s hard to put them back!” But the truth is, sometimes our words – even if we feel they are right or it’s our moral obligation to share them – can hurt the cause for Christianity. And people are watching. We can often do more harm than good with the words we utter.
When we say something that causes another person to feel badly about himself/herself – particularly with regard to the love, grace and mercy offered by our Heavenly Father… if we plant even the slightest seed of doubt or question that God could love this person who practices an alternative lifestyle, is of a different race or ethnicity, or doesn’t fit our socio-economic standards… we have betrayed our own faith and truly served the wrong master. We’ve left the door wide open for Satan, and said, “You’re not good enough for Jesus… but there’s room for you in Hell.”
This may seem harsh and melodramatic. But I’ve seen the hurt and devastation in the hearts and lives of those at whom such seemingly “innocent” comments were directed. I’ve heard them say, “There’s no place for me in the church,” and watched them shrink from becoming part of a church family – or even accepting Christ as their Savior – because they felt unworthy, based on the attitudes and judgments of others. It breaks my heart to see this… but I can’t begin to imagine what it must do to Jesus. He gave so much for ALL of us… and we just don’t seem to get it much of the time. He told us clearly in the scripture to love others as we love ourselves… and HOW to love one another… and we still can’t seem to get it right.
All I am asking is that we guard our thoughts and take a deep breath before we speak – or post – or judge. Let’s ask ourselves… “Will this further the Kingdom of God… or will it do more harm than good?” It wouldn’t hurt to stop and utter a prayer and ask God to help us decide which way to go! Once we have a clear direction, we can proceed… confident that God is pleased with our words and actions… and that His will is being done. We won’t have to worry about retracting our words or deeds… if we just take a little time to prayerfully consider them in the first place.
©2011 Debbie Robus
Daily Devotional for February 23, 2011
Psalm 35:9-28
I will celebrate and be joyful because you, LORD, have saved me. Every bone in my body will shout: "No one is like the LORD!" You protect the helpless from those in power; you save the poor and needy from those who hurt them. Liars accuse me of crimes I know nothing about. They repay evil for good, and I feel all alone. When they were sick, I wore sackcloth and went without food. I truly prayed for them, as I would for a friend or a relative. I was in sorrow and mourned, as I would for my mother.
I have stumbled, and worthless liars I don't even know surround me and sneer. Worthless people make fun and never stop laughing. But all you do is watch! When will you do something? Save me from the attack of those vicious lions. And when your people meet, I will praise you and thank you, Lord, in front of them all. Don't let my brutal enemies be glad because of me. They hate me for no reason. Don't let them wink behind my back. They say hurtful things, and they lie to people who want to live in peace. They are quick to accuse me. They say, "You did it! We saw you ourselves."
You see everything, LORD! Please don't keep silent or stay so far away. Fight to defend me, Lord God, and prove that I am right by your standards. Don't let them laugh at me or say to each other, "Now we've got what we want! We'll gobble him down!" Disappoint and confuse all who are glad to see me in trouble, but disgrace and embarrass my proud enemies who say to me, "You are nothing!"
Let all who want me to win be happy and joyful. From now on let them say, "The LORD is wonderful! God is glad when all goes well for his servant." Then I will shout all day, "Praise the LORD God! He did what was right."
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
In his recent “Sweet Tea” column for the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, Jay Grelen writes about Otus the Head Cat, the now-deceased “writer” of a weekly column in the same newspaper. Through his owner, Otus “channeled” his column, and while it was pure satire, the writing was just believable enough that many thought the comments made there were true. So it was that Otus credited former President Richard Nixon with creating “President’s Day,” and a writer for USA Today, believed this and perpetuated the story. It took some research by a skeptical law student to discern that “President’s Day” was actually initiated by former President Bill Clinton during his tenure.
We are a gullible group! We are also prone to making quick judgments, lying, and believing the fabrications of others. At best, we often operate with less than half of the facts and make our decisions accordingly. So is it any wonder that we often find ourselves being falsely accused or judged by others? A reporter asked President Obama, “Does it disturb you that so many people hate you?” The President replied, “The people who dislike you don't know you. What they hate is whatever funhouse mirror image of you that's out there. And they don't know you. And so, you don't take it personally.”
But most of us do take it personally. We are hurt – sometimes deeply – by the slings and arrows of others… the misunderstandings and judgments… the personal attacks (even if delivered behind our backs). And nobody is immune… from school-age nicknames to disgruntled co-workers to false assumptions about sporting and political opponents and more. It’s a pretty sure bet you have felt the disdain, misunderstandings, or ungrateful attitude of someone at some point in your life.
So what are we to do? The answer comes in the last few lines of this passage. We are to keep on doing what we know is right. We are to keep on loving and serving and behaving well… to take the high road and hold our shoulders back and our chin out. We are to honor our faith in God… and leave the rest to Him. Because He will defend us. He will defeat our enemies and make things right. Never forget this!
When you are hurt and disappointed… when you are wrongly accused or judged… when you are talked about and treated thanklessly… remember WHO is in charge. The only One you have to worry about – the only One to whom you have to answer – is Almighty God. He will get to the bottom of things and set things right for you. It may seem a long time coming, but it will happen. So hang in there! Be who God has called you to be, and trust Him to fight on your behalf. And one other thing… remember to give God praise and glory for loving you so well. Give Him a shout out and the credit He is due!
©2011 Debbie Robus
I will celebrate and be joyful because you, LORD, have saved me. Every bone in my body will shout: "No one is like the LORD!" You protect the helpless from those in power; you save the poor and needy from those who hurt them. Liars accuse me of crimes I know nothing about. They repay evil for good, and I feel all alone. When they were sick, I wore sackcloth and went without food. I truly prayed for them, as I would for a friend or a relative. I was in sorrow and mourned, as I would for my mother.
I have stumbled, and worthless liars I don't even know surround me and sneer. Worthless people make fun and never stop laughing. But all you do is watch! When will you do something? Save me from the attack of those vicious lions. And when your people meet, I will praise you and thank you, Lord, in front of them all. Don't let my brutal enemies be glad because of me. They hate me for no reason. Don't let them wink behind my back. They say hurtful things, and they lie to people who want to live in peace. They are quick to accuse me. They say, "You did it! We saw you ourselves."
You see everything, LORD! Please don't keep silent or stay so far away. Fight to defend me, Lord God, and prove that I am right by your standards. Don't let them laugh at me or say to each other, "Now we've got what we want! We'll gobble him down!" Disappoint and confuse all who are glad to see me in trouble, but disgrace and embarrass my proud enemies who say to me, "You are nothing!"
Let all who want me to win be happy and joyful. From now on let them say, "The LORD is wonderful! God is glad when all goes well for his servant." Then I will shout all day, "Praise the LORD God! He did what was right."
Scripture taken from the Contemporary English Version © 1991,1992, 1995 by American Bible Society, Used by Permission.
In his recent “Sweet Tea” column for the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, Jay Grelen writes about Otus the Head Cat, the now-deceased “writer” of a weekly column in the same newspaper. Through his owner, Otus “channeled” his column, and while it was pure satire, the writing was just believable enough that many thought the comments made there were true. So it was that Otus credited former President Richard Nixon with creating “President’s Day,” and a writer for USA Today, believed this and perpetuated the story. It took some research by a skeptical law student to discern that “President’s Day” was actually initiated by former President Bill Clinton during his tenure.
We are a gullible group! We are also prone to making quick judgments, lying, and believing the fabrications of others. At best, we often operate with less than half of the facts and make our decisions accordingly. So is it any wonder that we often find ourselves being falsely accused or judged by others? A reporter asked President Obama, “Does it disturb you that so many people hate you?” The President replied, “The people who dislike you don't know you. What they hate is whatever funhouse mirror image of you that's out there. And they don't know you. And so, you don't take it personally.”
But most of us do take it personally. We are hurt – sometimes deeply – by the slings and arrows of others… the misunderstandings and judgments… the personal attacks (even if delivered behind our backs). And nobody is immune… from school-age nicknames to disgruntled co-workers to false assumptions about sporting and political opponents and more. It’s a pretty sure bet you have felt the disdain, misunderstandings, or ungrateful attitude of someone at some point in your life.
So what are we to do? The answer comes in the last few lines of this passage. We are to keep on doing what we know is right. We are to keep on loving and serving and behaving well… to take the high road and hold our shoulders back and our chin out. We are to honor our faith in God… and leave the rest to Him. Because He will defend us. He will defeat our enemies and make things right. Never forget this!
When you are hurt and disappointed… when you are wrongly accused or judged… when you are talked about and treated thanklessly… remember WHO is in charge. The only One you have to worry about – the only One to whom you have to answer – is Almighty God. He will get to the bottom of things and set things right for you. It may seem a long time coming, but it will happen. So hang in there! Be who God has called you to be, and trust Him to fight on your behalf. And one other thing… remember to give God praise and glory for loving you so well. Give Him a shout out and the credit He is due!
©2011 Debbie Robus
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